Disco Dance

I don't recognise the person in the photograph, possibly because she is wearing a rubber hood. Her lips are painted deep crimson, her mouth is slightly open, and her eyes are closed, probably deliberately. The eye shadow is dark, and she has long, false eyelashes. Below the picture is a short message, "Mmmmmm....."I'm immediately excited, but have no idea who it's from. So I'm caught between lust and ignorance. What can I do?Send a reply, I suppose. So I compose a text, keeping the language as neutral as I can. "Hello. You look fascinating, but I don't think we've met. How did you get my number? Are you sure you've sent this to the right person?" I press send and rejoin my friends at the bar but moments later, my pocket buzzes again.I step aside once more and this time, the picture is of a very full breast, poking out of a zip in a latex catsuit. The nipple is very erect and like the lips, it's been painted a deep crimson colour too. This time the text says, "Oh yes, I know who you. .. you get the idea. Anyway, the thought occurred to me that in my, ‘Want To Have Done’ column I could just have easily put, ‘Have a hot girl who’ll do anything I want’. I could have saved myself carpal tunnel.I saved and closed the file at that point. I had a lot to think about, following that exercise in futility. I realized, and I’m about to use big words, because what I had was an epiphany. I’m a narcissist and that’s not the full word meaning narc either. If you don’t know what it means you shouldn’t have been reading what I’d written so far either.Nowhere in my lists had I written anything about falling head over heels in love with a woman. Everything I wrote to do with the interaction between me and a woman revolved around me. Sure, it’s my list, but in my head, I’d love to fall head over heels for a beautiful woman – as long as she either unconditionally bows to my every whim, or focuses a hundred percent of her energy into making me want to lick dirt off her shoe.FYI, my list.
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